If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize