marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
