Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
lets start a swedish sibling band together
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
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