that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
