I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
he shaved USA in his pubs
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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