she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
