My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Say something about gay babies.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
