Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Randomize
