look no pants
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Randomize
