Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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