All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
