smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
