So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
