im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
