Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize