well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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