There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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