I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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