But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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