how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
