he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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