if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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