yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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