Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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