How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
