check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
my poor anus
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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