what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
