How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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