remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
