I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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