Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
