Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize