i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
