how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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