His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
