I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
