Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
where does the pee come out of this thing
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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