these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Randomize
