I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
