lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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