My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize
