If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Randomize