it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
You need a sexual gate keeper
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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