There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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