he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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