I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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