What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
