its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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