I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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