butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize